Why Do We Self-Sabotage?

Often when things are starting to get really good in relationships or business, when we're starting to succeed in life, we sabotage ourselves. Why?



The new is strange and uncomfortable and at times can be scary. Venturing into it means that we might lose the happiness we've worked so hard for. If we decide to take the plunge into the great unknown, we might make a mistake and "fail". That failure will bring us pain and we'll be "failures".

I'm here to tell you today that feeling comfortable can be dangerous trap. Feeling comfortable and staying in that known place won't help you grow. Making mistakes is necessary for growth. We have to stop viewing mistakes as failures and start viewing them as necessary steps in our evolutionary process. Pressure, feeling slightly uncomfortable, is needed for growth.

If you feel called to take the next step in your relationship or career, but are afraid that doing so will result in you losing what you've created, I encourage you to do so anyway.

Life is meant to be lived. Mistakes are never failures, just stepping stones in the direction of your dreams. Making them is necessary for growth. Do not fear them.

If it's success that you fear, ask yourself why? Do you think that becoming successful will bring you more anxiety than you're comfortable dealing with? Why? Dig down deep into the source of your fear. Question it and release.

Dive into the abyss with an open heart and know that you are always being guided along your journey.

Imagine yourself as an elderly person for a moment and think back on your life. Ask yourself, "What do I regret? The mistakes I made, or the things I was too afraid to try?"

Don't let fear rule you. Use your pain to drive you forward.


Love Christina

Why Do We Choose Suffering?

I go through phases, as I'm sure we all do, where I fall into my ego, where I constantly think about my image and try to manipulate it so others will perceive me how I want them to. The endless thinking and worrying usually results in me crying on the floor, miserable.

I break... and realize I can't feed the entity inside me that hungers for separation. It hurts too much. And because I've experienced true presence before, and remember what that bliss feels like, I always return to the truth: I'm already whole. Nothing outside of myself will bring me joy. It's I who give joy to the moment.



I've been consistent over the last week or so with my practice of consciously choosing to stay in complete awareness. For me, thinking about my image and all the clothes and things I don't have yet trigger me into getting sucked back into old patterns of behaviour. So I've chosen to stop questioning myself about if I'm presenting myself properly, if I'm following fashion trends, if I'm pleasing everyone. I've stopped caring and I feel so... free.

It's funny how a simple change in perspective can literally change your entire reality. A choice as simple as letting go of a thought can bring you joy that you're seeking.
It's always so funny to me to look backat myself when I return to presence. I often ask myself, "If a thought wasn't helping me move forward and it wasn't bringing me any happiness, why did I hold onto it?"

Why do we hold onto suffering? Why do we choose to inflict pain on ourselves?


When I look upon the world from my Being, from a place of stillness and equanimity, it's so easy for me to spot who is stuck in their mind. Which of my fellow humans are choosing pain. And I ask myself... why? Why choose pain when life could be so simple and joyous?

The answer is always as simple and clear as life is: People choose suffering when they've forgotten who they really are.

When you realize that in truth, you are an eternal being inhabiting a human form, here for a short while to learn, there is no need to worry or choose suffering. There is no need to punish yourself for mistakes made, because you realize there are no mistakes. All is growth. There is no more reason to fear when you remember all is one. No one is above you. No one can have power over you unless you give it to them by fearing them. There is no more reason to fear time, because you have eternity to "get it right". What are you left with? The moment. Life. Joy.

Read more: Why Do We Choose Suffering?

I Should vs. I Could

I was reading Louise Hay's "You Can Heal Your Life" as I was writing my new e-book, which I have turned into a 2-week E-course all about connecting to your heart, finding your greatest joy, and expressing that fearlessly! Check it out here. In the book, there was a simple yet really effective exercise that I've incorporated into my course. It was all about the importance of language. Check out my latest video to try it out for yourself:

Our language can either enslave us or empower us. When we use I should, we automatically are disempowered. We feel like little children misbehaving, not doing something that we should be doing. It makes us feel like we're in the wrong. When we use I could, on the otherhand, this opens up a world of opportunity. I could tells our brains that we are capable of doing whatever we set our minds too. I could empowers us to act. It makes our dreams tangible, doable and real.

 

Love Christina

Your Perfect Day

Sometimes we can mistake our daily chores for life, but in reality they are simply things we're choosing to put attention on. Even simple household chores can seem like monstrous tasks if we don't take the time to slow down and get centered. All too often we end up worrying about the never ending to-do list, stay stuck looking outward, caught up in the future. This causes us immense (and unnecessary) anxiety and puts us into a state of overwhelm. To deal with the confusion, we turn to the television to comfort ourselves. But of course the media does it’s best to keep us afraid and tells us that in order to solve our problems, we should buy our happiness. And in our uncomfortable state, sometimes we believe that this is true. We think to ourselves, “Well, if I did have those shoes and that car and that person, then I would be complete. I would finally feel okay.” And the cycle continues… we remain stuck in our thoughts about a “better” future and remain lost in our own delusions.

 

Why do we do this? Why do we continually resist the moment? In my opinion, it’s always to save ourselves pain. We put ourselves into overwhelming situations that seem unsurmountable and so instead of taking action, we end up doing nothing. And to feel okay with the fact that we’re living mediocre lives, we numb ourselves with alcohol and television.

To break free from this cycle, become present.

Removing yourself from the never ending to-do list can be as simple as taking 10 minutes out of your day to meditate. Doing this will put things into perspective. From a place of stillness and strength, you can then ask yourself, “What can I do in this moment?” And that’s really all you ever need to know. The moment is all you’re ever going to have. When you enter it entirely, you empower yourself to create an amazing life. Suddenly all the pain you were afraid to feel… you see was never real to begin with.

What would your perfect day look like?

After meditation, when I am all charged up, I like to send out my intentions. An exercise that I love to do every couple of months or so is write about my perfect day. If you had a limitless supply of cash, perfect health, no limitations, what would a perfect day in your life look like? What part of the world would you live in? Where would you wake up? Who would be there with you? What would you eat for breakfast? What would your house look like? Would you be able to see the ocean from your window? What would you do with your day? Would you go outside and surf? What would the temperature be like, etc?

You want to be extremely specific with this exercise. Think of all the little details. The clearer the better. Write down your perfect day in the past tense, as if it’s already happened. It’s that real. Then, create short daydreams to match your story. Sending out short, easily repeatable daydreams into the universe will help you manifest your dreams so much easier than if you were simply speaking and feeling. The universe works in symbols. It speaks to us in symbols. In order to communicate back, daydream.

Let me know how this works for you! I’ve looked back on my perfect day stories and have been pleasantly surprised to see I’ve received almost everything I asked for. It works like a charm! If you don’t receive everything right away, don’t fret. You simply may not be prepared for it yet. The universe will provide when the timing is right. Stay joyful and let life flow. Trust that you are exactly where you need to be and learning what you need to.

Love Christina

Morning Routine: What are You Grateful For?

I’ve been realizing how important it is to have a morning routine. After all, isn’t the key to having a good life as simple as having good habits? To set the tone for an amazing day, I wake up and: make coffee, brush my teeth and wash, eat my vitamins, drink a protein mixture and lots of water, make a healthy breakfast, and sit down to meditate.

Adding a meditation practice to your own morning routine can help you sink deep into your body so you can become aware of any toxic thought or emotion stored within and let it go. Sitting and becoming aware of the breath keeps you grounded, connected to the earth, to the moment and to the truth. Sitting without thought naturally generates qi. Meditation charges us up like batteries so we can enter into the world in our full power. Meditation provides us with healing energy that enters into our auric field which serves to protect us throughout the day.

After including a mediation into my morning routine, I’ve noticed that I am able to differentiate between my problems and someone else’s. I can stay centered in my own being, feel my emotions and thoughts, and choose not to take on the drama of others. For those of you who are highly sensitive or empathic, meditation is almost a necessity to start your day off right. Simple cleansing visualizations can do wonders.

After I leave my house, I listen to music that uplifts me and puts me in a good mood. I have also been making it a habit to go over everything that I am grateful for: my health, my friends, my new apartment, my new forest to explore, etc…

It’s up to YOU to put yourself on a good vibration. This life is YOURS to create.

Love Christina

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